Skips' Affliction
by TheBooksofEli
Summary: Skips has been acting unusual lately — and it's only getting worse — maybe it's the Guardians of Eternal Youth that have some part in this? I wrote this as a short pass-the-time story (it'll be like 6 chapters, most likely) so I can develop my thoughts as well as my other stories. Enjoi...
1. Chapter 1 - Conjured

**Chapter 1 - Conjured**

Skips opened the door to his home in the park, a long day's work all behind him. He skipped slowly to the center of the room with the lights still off, then there was a solitary silhouette made from a match Skips lit and added to the candlewicks around the circumference of his cross-legged body. Smoke filled the dim room with it's shimmering fumes, all of different colors of the rainbow. Skips took in this beautiful, psychedelic scent, filling him with joy. Beside him lied a miniature cistern of vinegar in which he sprinkled ginger roots shavings and a dash of cumin, topped with a few spearmint leaves. Without a further ado, Skips partook of the bitter mix, every drop of it, then wiped his mouth on his arm. Almost like a trap, Skips shut his eyes and began to glow golden, waves of invisible pain rushed from his top to bottom, Skips clenched his fists and gnashed his teeth, felling death's course near upon him as the intensity of the glow made the hair on his body breeze freely. The glow penetrated and burst through the ceiling and continued its pathway to the midnight sky. Involuntarily, Skips eyes rolled back, which began to succumb to jaundice, then Skips felt his muscles deplete and decrease as the glow of pain lifted him off the ground, then, like a nuclear blast, the glow sucked into Skips chest and shot out in all directions. The wicks were blown out and the candlelight was no more, Skips was held in the air for a moment, then fell with a thud on the ground — restored to health, but out cold.


	2. Chapter 2 - Victimized

**Chapter 2 - Victimized**

The sun came out over the horizon. Mordecai and Rigby were wiping the sleep out of their eyes once again to another routine day of boredom.

"Just another Tequila Sunrise."

"Amen." Rigby grasped his head ad tensed. "Ugh...my head still hurts from yesterday."

"No, man, I meant look at that sun — it's so orange."

"Your right, it is pretty cool, isn't it?" He asked rhetorically. They looked back at each other, then raced to the bathroom, Mordecai took the lead and slammed the door behind him — regrettably, catching on Rigby's tail.

_**"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" **_

Mordecai's voice was barely heard from the other side. "Oh, get over it."

_**"DUDE, THAT'S MY TAIL YOU'VE JUST CLOSED IT ON!"**_

"It's not that bad."

_**"MINE IS ATTACHED TO A STRING OF BONES, YOURS ARE JUST FEATHERS; DIFFERENCE: IT DOESN'T HURT LIKE HELL WHEN YOU LOSE ONE!"**_

"Sounds like a personal problem." Mordecai clang to the knob and reached for the shower handle at the same time. "Okay, I can't hear you anymore — the shower's on." Rigby tugged his tail out in writhing pain; looking down on it.

"Screw you man!"

A looming shadow passed over Rigby, it was Skips.

"Oh, hey Skips."

Skips stood at the end of the hall, his body was black as night which contrasted with his eyes — white as a lie.

"Quit staring at me like that."

Nothing moved. Skips just kept staring with his ghastly eyes.

"Hello!" Rigby found a crunched can on the ground and target practiced on Skips. Still, no move made. Then Skips charged at ludicrous speed.

**_"AH! MORDECAI, OPEN UP, OPEN UP DANGIT!"_**

"YOU GAY, BRO?"

**_"NO! IT'S-"_**_  
_

* * *

A few seconds later, Mordecai wrapped a towel around himself an opened the door to a empty hall.

"Rigby, it's your-" The telltale Skips appeared ominously from around the corner.

**"WHAT IS THAT?"** Before he could make it out, Skips reached Mordecai and took off with an unconscious Mordecai without a sound.


	3. Chapter 3 - Dead Men Tell No Tales

**Chapter 3 - ****Dead Men Tell No Tales**

"Mordecai?" Benson called and paused before he continued, ".. Rigby...Ugh! Where _are_ those two idiots? And what's taking them so long?"

Pops sat downstairs at the breakfast table. "Come to think of it, I haven't seen Skips in quite a while, either."

"Well, Skips better be teaching them how to work because I haven't the slightest idea of where they could possibly be." Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost were strolling past the kitchen entrance when Benson stopped them.

"Muscle Man and Hi Five Ghost, can I trust you guys to look for them?"

Dumbfounded, Muscle Man asked "Who's them?"

"Isn't it obvious?"

Suddenly Thomas stepped into the house with a bag full of dirt and twigs, poking through the thin plastic of the bag.

"Hey, Benson, where did you want these again?"

"Set them on the porch, and once you're out there, find the usual suspects. Skips is probably with them."

"Oh, gotcha."

"See, Muscle Man, was it that hard to understand?"

* * *

Thomas carried the bags in front of him now, obstructing his frontal view, but as he set the bags down, he looked up and found Mordecai and Rigby both in his face, snorting like bulls.

"Oh, hey, Benson wants to see you two."

They didn't respond, just stared back at Thomas with grimaces and bloodshot eyes and black, pulsating veins. Then all of the sudden, Rigby pounced on to Thomas' neck and bit down, but he was pulled off instantly. Thomas kicked both bags into their feet, sending them falling down the wooden staircase. At the bottom, a looming Skips waited and helped the duo back on their feet. Thomas was grasping his neck in anguish, banging at the door as much as he could, soon after subdued by an unstoppable surge of water being shot from the garden hose at his face. Skips sprayed until Thomas collapsed on his side, writhing and nearly unconscious; he choked on the bitter taste of the ill-purified water and squinted back up at the three beings, gnashing their teeth and reaching down to finish the job.

* * *

Benson set his glass of OJ down and wiped away the last drops on his arm.

"What's taking Thomas so long?"

"Yeah, he's been gone forever, man," Muscle Man added.

Suddenly, a pool of water crossed through the threshold and soiled the tasseled ends of the carpet.

"Water?" said Hi Five Ghost inquisitively. "What's he up to?"

"I never told him to start the hose. Is this another prank of his?"

"If it is," Hi Five Ghost chimed in, "I'll say he got inventive this time." Benson approached the door.

"If it is he's-"

Just by his feet, Benson saw the three dark figures gnawing on Thomas' arm, neck and leg. Benson took only one look and they instantly stared back; Benson shrieked and shut out the awful sight as quick as he could.


End file.
